Today, I was on the elliptical machine at my gym perusing More magazine- “A magazine that celebrates women over 40.” Yes, I admit that I’m 43. But, I hear that 43 is the new 33. I digress.
Anyway, I ran across an article called “How Not To Act Old” by Pamela Redmond Satran, which is an excerpt from her book called “How Not to Act Old: 185 Ways to Pass for Phat, Sick, Hot, Dope, Awesome, or at Least Not Totally Lame”.
The article caught my attention because her advice made a lot of sense, was very witty and had applications in selling and the workplace. Her advice is not about acting like we’re much younger but how to better connect with those who may be younger.
As salespeople we are not always working with decision makers or influencers that are the same age as us. And, as business leaders, we often have staff of all ages- and may even work for a boss who is many year our junior.
Here are a few tidbits from the article…
Don’t spout any history & Don’t be a human archive
- If it happened before 2001, who really cares? Satran believes that most 20 somethings don’t care about nostalgia, antique stores, national monuments and re-enactments of any kind. Avoid phrases like “back in the day”, “in a past life” and stories about the last CEO or the last sales leader. They want to talk about current events.. like who pulled a Kanye this week.
Don’t yell into your cell phone
- Satran is absolutely right.. when was the last time you saw an annoying teenager or 20 something talking loudly into their cell in a public place. You probably haven’t- as they have mastered the whispering or texting. But, why are the 40+ guys in suits, especially in airports, always yelling?
You’re not mom or dad, so leave the doughnuts, leftovers and birthday cards at home
Avoid direct confrontation. No shouting. No showdowns.
- Satran recommends raising issues with a less aggressive, electronic touch. Don’t return calls or emails. Unfriend someone on Facebook. Use questions instead of comments.
- I don’t personally like these recommendations, but I think she’s probably right. I have a younger brother from my Dad’s second marriage who is 20 years old. He is the least direct guy you could meet. He ignores the phone and voicemail and does everything via text.
A few additions from the Marci archives:
Don’t Ignore Twitter
- I have run into a number of 40 and 50 somethings recently that openly joke that although they’re on LinkedIn, they are scared of Twitter. To me, that ages them immediately. Understanding Twitter and (ideally) using Twitter shows that you are up on the latest technology. And there are so many business and selling applications. (Check out my recommendations for Sales Experts To Follow on Twitter)
Pearl Vision, Lenscrafters Here We Come
- I was recently chatting with a career coach who often works with older job seekers on their career strategy. She mentioned that outside of grey hair, one of the number one things that visually ages adults, is their eyeglass selection. If you have not updated your eyeglass frames in a few years, do so immediately.
I’ll wrap up today’s post with a fun, yet related quote.
“People do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing.” Author unknown
Please add your additional stay young, connect young, tips in the comment section.
Love your interpretation of the book, Marci, and I think your insights are exactly right. Does behavior follow texting or vice versa? Whatever the source, today’s 20 somethings are much more low key and indirect and, at work at least, we need to get on board with that.
Pam Satran[Click to quote this in your comment]
Damn, I have some work to do Marci and Pam!
Thanks for the wake up call!
Respectfully,
Paul Castain
Paul Castain[Click to quote this in your comment]
Dang, Marci – If I can’t talk about my 6 decades of trivial references and outdated slang, I got nuthin’, girl – nuthin’!
Laughing or not, this is all quite true – I’ve been watching this shape up since ‘back in the day’, and therefore keep trying to not actually SAY “back in the day”…
LOL!
mb, who actually does tweet, FB & even engages in the occasional texting, to the great shock and musement of her kids and grandkids.
Mary Beth Smith[Click to quote this in your comment]
Totally sick comments with fierce… something! I do remember my parents commenting on how young the policemen are looking and “BAM” it’s happened… As I read your piece (without eyeglasses- yet) I ticked off all those “faux pas” in a recent phone interview with someone I know may (best case) be straddling the voice mail/text threshold. The only one seem to have missed was eyeglass frames because I’m ignoring slightly blurry road signs by using my GPS (works great for those darn surface streets with no signs too!) LOL. However, now I have to consider whether a gen X decision maker is just low key and ignoring email and voicemail or I should just scratch that business opty off my forecast.
Warren L.[Click to quote this in your comment]
TERRIFIC article, Marci. At a recent management meeting at Google, a “senior” manager in his early thirties told another manager in his fifties that he was “totally irrelevant” and should shut up.
Thankfully not all our interactions with youth are as devastating, but some of the underlying feelings are there. Only if we’re aware of them and try to blend in, can we hope to continue to succeed in the world we’ve created.
Hank Trisler[Click to quote this in your comment]
I don’t know when it happened, but suddenly I’m older than everyone I make sales calls to. It occurred to me that several of my customers were young women 25-35 who were as perplexed about “getting ahead” as I was at their age. So I started a mastermind group and invited them to meet each other. Now we get together once a month for dinner and schmoozing and laugh our you-know-what’s off about everything. I secretly think they forgot how old I really am. Young people are much more fun than old people…no matter what their age.
Lori Feldman[Click to quote this in your comment]
These are such awesome comments! Thank you for adding your 2-3 cents.. and please keep it coming.
- Marci Reynolds
Marci Reynolds[Click to quote this in your comment]
Hi Marci, et al! (can I still say et al? probably not)
I’m 33 again and agree that the world she is a changin’. I think I’ve mastered texting and am working on instant messaging on my blackberry. I seem to have more than 2 thumbs some times.
Everyone’s remarks are relevant, and I love what Lori had to say. I try to put like minded people together too. We may have “been there, done that” but on the outside, they don’t care. I think however that on the inside they’re just as unsure about how best to succeed as we are about our abbreviations and text language (I keep trying to use proper sentence structure and worry about my spelling – OMG!).
Does anyone else agree that youthful cockiness is merely to hide insecurities?
Sandra[Click to quote this in your comment]
Marci,I am very old but don’t feel a bit old!!! I do worry about what new prospects think of us. I do keep up with the trends of eyeglasses, clothes, technology etc. I have to get that book for my Husband & I to read!!!
Everyone that knows me say “you don’t look your age” but I still have trouble saying that age!!!
I agree with Hank we have to try and blend in and read, read, especially Paul Castain’s Salesbook which helps me a lot!!!
Vickie Broyles
PS Leaving for MD Thurday to attend my 50th HS Reunion!!!
Vickie Broyles[Click to quote this in your comment]
I loved your comment about “being afraid of Twitter.” Even if you are, please don’t say that in public.
As for being old, being gray, in either hair color or attitude, is a choice.
I’m over 40 and I love it. I would never go back to the confusion that Lori mentioned that happens when you’re still trying to figure out who you are.
All the best!
Melissa
Melissa Paulik[Click to quote this in your comment]
Okay-how are we defining young??? I completely agree with the “Back in the day” comments although I am a nostalgic person by nature and I LOVE hearing stories about different times. However I can’t STAND hearing sales people say “I was the top producer back in 1987.” I mean honestly – everyone knows you are only as good as your last month in sales….Thanks for sharing and remember you are only as old as you act
Sara Allred[Click to quote this in your comment]